


Into the Light

by Moonykins



Category: Saiyuki
Genre: First Time, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-17
Updated: 2016-10-17
Packaged: 2018-08-23 01:59:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8309404
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Moonykins/pseuds/Moonykins
Summary: Something was different now.  Goku was different.  He was leading the charge, guiding Sanzo to where he needed to go, offering him his hand like Sanzo had done that day atop Mt. Gogyo.  Sanzo couldn't help but grasp it and stumble into the light.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [thooluu](https://archiveofourown.org/users/thooluu/gifts).



> A commission for a friend of mine who requested some delicious bottom Sanzo.

The strip of light underneath the bedroom door was interrupted by a shadow, the brightness being blocked out as whoever was on the other side walked to the center and stopped. Sanzo held his breath and silently willed the shadow's owner away, hoping that maybe they would think him to be asleep and simply decide to leave him be. He was content to spend time alone in the room he had rented for himself at their latest shabby inn. In fact, he had been looking forward to his alone time for weeks now, preferring to spend his time chain smoking, a cigarette in his mouth and a wispy trail of grey smoke floating toward the ceiling, an ashtray full of cigarette butts at his elbow. It relaxed him.

Okay, maybe “relaxed” wasn't exactly the right word for it. But he felt less stressed than he did when he was in the presence of the others. He could reflect this way. Clear his mind. Focus on the mission at hand without the distractions his idiot companions provided.

“Uhm, Sanzo?”

Speaking of idiot companions.

“I'm asleep.” Sanzo replied icily.

A muffled giggle came from the other side of the door. “If ya were asleep then ya wouldn'ta answered.”

“I was hoping you would have been stupid enough to miss that part.”

“I'm coming in.”

“I'd rather you di--”

The doorknob was turning and Sanzo let out a defeated sigh as Goku filled the space where the closed door had been. Well, the evening had been going peacefully. Goku shut the door behind him without a word, golden eyes averted toward the floor, an almost guilty expression on his face. He didn't dare take a step closer to Sanzo. Instead he just stood in the threshold, shifting nervously from one foot to the other. Sanzo heaved another sigh, giving himself until the count of three (Hakkai had told him that breathing exercises could help with his 'anger problems'. So far it had proven to be utter bullshit) before telling the idiot monkey off. “Well? Are you going to say anything? Or are you just going to stand there all fucking night?”

Honestly Sanzo didn't doubt that Goku might just stand there all night looking like a kicked puppy.

Goku's head snapped up with an audible click and the moment his eyes locked on Sanzo the monk found himself frozen in place. His heart sped up despite himself and he immediately knew what this was about. He dreaded the words that were surely forming in Goku's mind. 

“I don't want to talk about...that.” He spat the word out as if it had left a rotten taste in his mouth.

“But San--”

“Not now. Not ever.”

A fire was building in Goku's eyes. “You don't even know what I was gonna say!”

“I don't need to know.”

“Fine then. I'll just show ya.”

Wait, what? That hadn't been the response Sanzo had been expecting but before Sanzo could say another word Goku had bridged the distance between them in a leap, landing atop Sanzo on the bed. He grabbed a fistful of the blond's shirt and pulled Sanzo forward to crush their lips together. Sanzo knew he made an indignant noise, a muffled sound of protest, but it quickly died down once Goku's tongue slipped out of his mouth to lick at the priest's bottom lip, asking for entrance. Sanzo made the mistake of gasping at that little move which opened himself up for Goku's next attack. The monkey's tongue was suddenly in his mouth, licking and exploring, wiggling in a way that left Sanzo wondering. But he didn't have time to question it because his own tongue had found its counterpart as he opened his mouth wider and allowed Goku to take as much of him as he wanted, his body clearly ignoring his mind's orders to cease any and all movement.

Goku's hands moved from Sanzo's front to the nape of his neck, securing him in place, fingers threading through the ponytail that held his hair back. Sanzo could feel them twirling around his hair and the sensation was so sensual, so relaxing that it could have put him to sleep if the fire growing in his lower region wasn't stirring awake feelings of lust.

Once Goku was done thoroughly investigating Sanzo's mouth he pulled back, clamping his teeth lightly on the priest's bottom lip and sucking onto it before letting go with a loud pop. Sanzo stared as Goku pulled back, eyes blown wide and darkened to the point that they were almost completely black.

“Where...the fuck did you learn to do that?”

Seeming to come back to himself, Goku shifted nervously on Sanzo's lap which only served to heat Sanzo up even more than he already was since the monkey's ass was particularly close to his dick. Sanzo swallowed, trying to will his blood not to pool south. It wasn't listening at all. “Gojyo taught me some stuff.”

That certainly helped the blood divert. “What?!”

A soft smile came over Goku's face, his cheeks heating up in a blush that Sanzo considered to almost pretty, actually. “I asked him to teach me about sex an' things. He told me he'd teach me how to kiss an' then give me tips on the other stuff 'cause there was no way I was actually gonna do more than kiss him.”

The idea of storming from the room at that very moment to go and find Gojyo just so Sanzo could put a bullet between his eyes was very compelling, but the lap full of Goku was more so. Sanzo stayed in place, deciding that he could always kill Gojyo later. He had more important things to attend to right now. “Why did you ask him to teach you those things?”

“Because I...” Goku shifted again and Sanzo's breath left him for a moment. “I want to do them with you.”

They had been over this. Goku had proclaimed his love for Sanzo over a dozen times and each time the priest had brushed him off, stating he was too young and too dumb to know what love was (not that Sanzo had any idea what it was himself). Goku didn't know what to do with all of his teenage hormones and Sanzo was the most important figure in his life. It was only natural for him to gravitate toward him. It was nothing more than a silly crush. At least that was what Sanzo kept telling himself.

But the way Goku had just kissed him was telling him otherwise. The man in front of him wasn't the same young boy who Sanzo had rescued from the cave all those years ago. In fact, he was just that, he was a man. The nightshirt he wore was a few sizes too small, clinging to him in a way that showed off all the sinewy muscles he was developing in his chest and arms. The curve of his jaw was different—more square and mature. Even those round, dumpling cheeks were diminishing to give way to a much more adult look. Goku had grown up and Sanzo hadn't even realized it until that very moment.

“Shit...”

Sanzo's cock twitched in interest when Goku leaned back in for another kiss. This time Sanzo was much more inclined to participate, kissing back with just as much as Goku was giving him. He grabbed the young man by the arms, feeling the building muscles, his blood feeling like fire in his veins. He hadn't ever felt this before. He had always held himself back because despite the fact that he wanted Goku he knew it would be wrong to take advantage of the boy simply because he believed he wanted Sanzo. Something was different now. Goku was different. He was leading the charge, guiding Sanzo to where he needed to go, offering him his hand like Sanzo had done that day atop Mt. Gogyo. Sanzo couldn't help but grasp it and stumble into the light.

Their bodies rocked together, molding perfectly as the kiss heated, their tongues twining with one another. Sanzo's hands sneaked under Goku's shirt, desperate to touch his warm, sun kissed skin. They took turns removing their shirts and Sanzo only had enough time to briefly admire the contours of Goku's body before the monkey was leaning down, pressing wet kisses to Sanzo's neck and making a wet trail down his chest. Sanzo's breath hitched and his eyes closed, head tipping back into the pillows behind him. It was so easy to let go like this, to forget who he was and why he was holding back, to give himself over completely to his barest needs and wants.

Goku kissed lower, tongue sneaking out to lick at one of Sanzo's nipples, earning a soft hiss from the priest. One of Sanzo's hands found purchase in Goku's hair which he gripped as tightly as possible, a silent reminder that if Goku bit him he would cuff him about the head. Goku seemed to get the gist, instead steering clear of Sanzo's nipples and deciding a straight path down the center of his stomach would be the best course of action. His tongue dipped lightly into the divot of Sanzo's bellybutton and the blond couldn't help but wonder if Goku was actually tasting him. 

Goku kept going until he came to the button of Sanzo's jeans. He lifted his head, his eyes asking for permission. At this Sanzo hesitated. He could stop here, yell at Goku for disturbing his peaceful evening, and forget this whole thing ever happened. But the look in those golden eyes was driving him further. He wanted to let go. Even if it was just for one night.

Reaching down, Sanzo grasped the button of his jeans and opened them, sliding the fly down and pushing them off his hips. Goku took it from there, pulling the fabric the rest of the way off Sanzo's body, watching with hungry eyes as Sanzo's cock sprang free to lay hot and heavy against his stomach. The chimp's eyes darkened at the sight of it, tongue darting out to lick at his lips as he took it in hand, inspecting it as if it were a particularly delicious morsel of food. 

“I swear if you--”

Goku's pink tongue came out to lick a stripe from the root of Sanzo's cock to the tip, eyes locked on Sanzo's face the entire time. Sanzo was stunned into silence, his cock twitching eagerly in Goku's willing hands. If that expression hadn't been the sexiest thing Sanzo had seen in his entire life then he could die a happy man. In fact, if he died right now and that was the last image he ever saw he would call it a win.

“Is...is that okay, Sanzo?” Goku asked sheepishly. His cheek was practically brushing against Sanzo's cock. How he could sound so innocent after he had just blown Sanzo's mind like that was completely beyond the priest's realm of understanding.

“Just get on with it.”

“Okay.”

This time Goku flicked his tongue over the slit in the head of Sanzo's cock, toying with it while Sanzo lay there, completely at his mercy with nothing to do but moan wantonly. Goku took him slowly into his mouth, inch by inch, until his nose was nestled against Sanzo's pubic hair. He felt so wet and warm around Sanzo, his tongue running along the vein on the underside of his cock, testing out the texture of it. Sanzo felt he could die right there. Never in his life had he experienced this kind of pleasure. He had absolutely no idea what to do with himself but he was determined to hold out for as long as he could because he knew it was only going to get better.

And then Goku sucked.

Sanzo threw his head back and let out a lewd moan, his jaw falling open as he panted heavily for air. Goku closed his eyes and worked on relaxing his throat, doing his best to not choke, double checking everything Gojyo had taught him in his mind. He bobbed his head, dragging Sanzo's cock almost fully out of his mouth before diving right back down until it hit the back of his throat again. That earned another, louder moan from Sanzo. Goku's lips curled around the cock in his mouth, smiling as he silently congratulated himself. Sanzo watched him through heavily lidded eyes. Fucking cheeky monkey.

Falling into a rhythm was much easier than Goku thought it would be. Soon he had Sanzo lifting his hips in an attempt to literally fuck himself with Goku's mouth. A pair of hands on his hips prevented the priest from choking Goku as he worked Sanzo to completion. Sanzo shuddered, back arching off the bed as he came into Goku's mouth. When he next opened his eyes it was to the sight of Goku licking cum from the corner of his mouth and shit, he was already getting hard again.

“Was that okay, Sanzo?”

Sanzo didn't even know how to answer that. Instead he just told Goku to take his pants off, something the young man was all too willing to do. Sanzo pulled him closer so that Goku was straddling the air above him. He ran his hands down Goku's body, fingers shaking slightly the lower they got. Goku's cock stood at attention and Sanzo found that he had no idea what to do with it. He lightly ran his fingers over it and Goku gasped softly, the whole while watching, silently judging Sanzo's every move.

“Sanzo, if you want I could...” It was as if Goku could sense how nervous Sanzo was about all of this. He wasn't ready quite yet. He didn't know what he was doing. He didn't know how to make Goku feel good. “I mean, if you wanted to...I could...fuck you.”

Sanzo almost shuddered at the word. He looked up into Goku's eyes, finding them to be just as earnest as ever. He trusted those eyes with all of his being. “You'd better know what you're doing.”

Goku just smiled and climbed off of Sanzo, scrambling for his discarded pants. “I do! Don't worry! Gojyo told me.”

“Stop mentioning that perverted kappa.”

“Heh. Sorry.”

Sanzo watched curiously as Goku dug around in the pocket of his pants, coming up with a tiny bottle of some kind of clear liquid. Lubricant. Goku had lubricant. No doubt he had acquired it from Gojyo and Sanzo silently prayed that it wasn't from the kappa's own secret stash. No, it had a seal on it that Goku had to break. It was brand new, thank Buddha. The cap snapped open and Goku tipped the bottle, pouring just a bit too much into his hand. The liquid dripped onto the bed sheets and Sanzo cursed at him, but that certainly didn't deter Goku from his task. He instructed Sanzo to flip over onto his stomach and lift his behind into the air, something Sanzo did with a little hesitation. He felt so exposed like this, his ass presented to Goku, body helplessly vulnerable.

Though he knew what was coming next he couldn't say he knew what it would feel like. It was very...wet. The noise Goku's finger made as it slipped inside of him would have been comical had they been doing anything else but this. Instead the intrusion left Sanzo feeling very uncomfortable.

“It'll get better, I promise.”

“It...better.” Sanzo grunted, trying to hold onto the last remaining bit of his dignity. If he could still sound like he didn't care, like this didn't hurt, then his pride would still be in tact. At least that's what he was currently telling himself.

Goku worked the digit in and out against Sanzo's muscles, loosening them until the uncomfortable feeling from before began to dissipate. Slowly it was beginning to feel...good. No, it was much more than good. Sanzo hadn't realized he was panting until he felt a second finger slip inside to join the first. They worked together to scissor him open, stretching and preparing him for what was to come. His whole body was rocking against Goku's fingers, trying to get them to go deeper, press harder. Sanzo wanted more. So much more. He felt Goku's free hand on his hip, steadying him as the third and final finger was introduced. Now Sanzo felt full—stretched and needing. He pressed back against the digits as hard as he could, fucking himself on them as much as possible before Goku pulled them out.

“Fucking hurry.” he demanded, his voice sounding hoarse from all of the moaning he had been doing.

Goku laughed behind him and Sanzo heard the slick sound of Goku lubricating his cock. “I don't wanna hurt ya, Sanzo.”

“You won't.” Sanzo didn't know if he had meant for that to sound tough or reassuring. Either way it worked.

Goku lined himself up, pressing the head of his cock to Sanzo's entrance and pausing for a beat before slowly pushing inside. It was difficult to breach that ring of muscle, despite the fact that Sanzo had been properly prepared. Goku was thicker than the three fingers had been and Sanzo found that he could barely breathe as they pressed together.

“A-Am I hurting you?”

Sanzo shook his head furiously. It didn't hurt, not exactly.

Goku slid in further until his balls were pressed to Sanzo's ass. With his hands on Sanzo's hips, he waited, relishing the feel of Sanzo, warm and welcoming around him. “Sanzo...y-you're so tight.”

The only response he got was a small moan. Sanzo couldn't possibly speak any words right then. He felt Goku's thumbs drawing lazy circles into his hip bones, and then the feeling of warm lips against his neck. He shivered, his blood freezing although his body was on fire.

“Move.”

Goku's tongue traced the shell of his ear, nipping at the lobe before pulling back. “Kay.”

His hips pulled back, slipping halfway out before pushing back inside. Sanzo's jaw dropped open in a quiet moan. When Goku pulled back again Sanzo was sure to thrust backward, connecting with Goku just as he pushed forward. Together the two found a rhythm, slowly building up speed as they worked out the ways their bodies slid together. Goku's hand snaked down to Sanzo's cock, still wet from the excess lubricant he had used before. He took Sanzo in hand and began pumping him in tandem with their thrusts, the sensation almost too much for Sanzo to bare.

Why had he been so afraid of letting go? Being connected to Goku like this felt almost natural. He and Goku had always been connected in a mental way but this was the first time they had been joined physically. Even now Sanzo could hear Goku's voice screaming out in pleasure in his mind. He could hear him begging, his words slewing together, a jumble of “I love you”s and Sanzo's own name echoing around his brain. He wondered if Goku could hear him the same way. Sanzo wondered what kinds of things he was saying in Goku's mind. Was he saying the same things Goku was? Those were things he would never say aloud but perhaps Goku could understand them through the connection they shared. Perhaps Goku could feel the way he trusted him. Maybe he could understand that Sanzo would never do this with any other person because no one else could compare to Goku. Goku never asked for anything in return. Sanzo had freed him and for that he was eternally grateful. He would follow Sanzo to the ends of the Earth, doing his best to repay the priest every day of his life. At first Sanzo had viewed it merely as annoying. He wished Goku could go off on his own, grow up and lead his own life. Now Sanzo selfishly wanted to keep Goku to himself. They were broken. So incredibly broken. But together, like this, they formed one whole, complete being.

“Goku!!”

His vision was whiting out, hips pitched forward as he came in spurts all over Goku's hand and the bed beneath him. As usual, Goku followed closely behind him, thrusting thrice more before stilling inside of him.

Sanzo allowed himself a moment of fragility, falling forward onto the bed as he fought to catch his breath. He felt Goku drop beside him and turned to catch a big, dopey smile on the brunet's face. Sanzo grunted and rolled over, grasping for a cigarette and his lighter. The comfortable silence from before filled the room once more and Sanzo took the time to enjoy his cigarette, eyes drifting to Goku every now and again.

“That was...amazing, Sanzo.”

Sanzo chose not to reply. Goku knew what he was thinking so why should he bother verbalizing it?

“Uhm, Sanzo?” Purple eyes flickered over to Goku who was lying on his side, looking curiously at him. “Can I stay with you tonight?”

Sanzo released a puff of smoke into the air above him. “Yeah.”

Goku's face lit up and he eagerly tucked himself against Sanzo's body. They had slept like this before, though all those previous times they had been clothed. It was different this time. Sanzo felt much more relaxed, more open. He draped an arm over Goku's shoulder, comfortably pulling the young man against him. He heard Goku let out a sigh, his warm breath tickling Sanzo's neck.

Sanzo continued to smoke in silence until he reached the filter of his cigarette. Once he stubbed it out in the ashtray he settled down fully in bed, finding that Goku had already drifted off to sleep. He couldn't help the smile that touched his lips and he didn't know what it was, but something compelled him to drop a kiss to Goku's forehead.

He fell into a dreamless sleep that night, Goku's heart beating against the palm of his hand.


End file.
